lollylove8

01:24 am: thank you
warning: long angry rant
i would just like to write this to say thank you. thank you for successfully waking me up. i have now been re-awake for an hour thanks to you. i had a nice long, tiresome day full of multiple activities none of which included rest. my bed was looking like a nice little cloud for me to rest upon, yes.. until you came back. and what. oh ya, got on your computer and fucked around on facebook/ aim. so now, after keeping me up for an hour you are now getting into bed, leaving me fully awake, unable to sleep and you're happily in your own cozy bed. so thank you. after a busy 17 hour day, i am now going to have to begin again tomorrow morning at 9 off of oh yes 7 hours of sleep. to some that may seem an eternity, but if you throw in 3 hours of practice and god knows how long of homework, FUCK. so thank you for being a selfish person and keeping me awake, i hope that my typing right now keeps your annoying ass awake.
thank you for also having the amazing ability to turn a nice cheery room into an ice storm. is there really a need to put up such a stoney barrier. i honestly don't understand what your problem is. why do you feel the need to be so exclusive? what are you a 7th grader? honestly. don't be such a fake person. don't befriend people if you only intend to ultimately cut them out. just don't waste the time or the effort to begin with. that's just stupid. at this point how are you supposed to say to someone "oh you know what, i dont' think i want to hang out with you" after establishing a close group of friends all of which you have some insane urge to exclude me from. it's honestly not a huge deal i just don't understand why it's you of all people having to do that. i mean, why is it YOU who needs to put that wall up. everyone else doesn't ahve a problem. seriously, we live in the same 16'x10' room and we're going to continue to until may so you might as well fucking open your eyes and realize that you're not the only one in this room. i've tried to compromise. your little quorks are starting to piss me off. i don't understand. sometimes i honestly feel like i let people walk right over me, but i feel as if i'm too nice of a person to say anythign otherwise.
so thank you for waking me up 2 nights in a row, i really appretiate it. i hope karma comes and bites you in the ass.

.... i miss home. i hate that nothing is going to be the same when we get back. i miss living in my room alone, and dori ... who might not even be there when i get back, and trixie and all the food that makes home home. yes, i miss the people but i feel like if i want to talk to you i can call you, you'll always be available, but the feeling of home is what is gone. i'm scared to see if it's still going to feel the same in sp, or if it's going to be some foreign place. sometimes i think i made the wrong decision leaving, but othertimes i know that i'm just being stupid. i can't wait for thanksgiving.

10:58 pm: best txt message of my life
from some amazing ghetto fabulous guy

"i was jus callin 2 talk 2 u shawty. i go 2 holy cross so i dnt think i can see u often enuf 2 speak"

shawty?
enuf?

lol. i'm going to laugh myself to sleep

11:23 pm: answers
so my brother told me that j.k. rowling answered some of the questions from hp. and its true. not that now i feel like my life is fully complete but it did help to explain some questions.

http://entertainment.msn.com/news/article.aspx?news=270634>1=10150

10:13 am: i love you.
so i was walking off campus right after i picked my insert up from mr. whitney. and i'm reading it, before i'm even off campus i start crying. i cry all the way home. when i get home i flip through the same insert and somehow, stupidly decide to read sinead's insert, which was stupid because it made me cry even harder.
moral of the story. i love auntie sineaners.

06:47 pm: has it hit anybody else that we graduate tomorrow?

07:26 pm: haha....
......i should study for the bio final...

o well

01:05 pm: its been a while.

WE LEAVE FOR YOSEMITE ON WEDNESDAY! 
....just two days of testing for me before. 

fuck.  

09:27 pm: clark university vs. bu


.........ah!

09:45 pm: college update
so, after a semi-disappointing week of college 

rejection
cal poly slo
ucsd
ucsb

 waitlisted 
northeastern 

ACCEPTANCE!
sf state
ucr
.....both, i feel great accomplishments ... not...

merrimack college

and then, AH! i feel numb from the surprise
BOSTON UNIVERSITY!

i seriously can't believe it, ah! i'm super excited for my trip back east now, since i actually have a school there that i am now actually considering going to! ah! i can't believe it, now i need to try to concentrate on homework... its really hard to concentrate. 

edit:
monday: clark university with a $5,000 scholarship

09:45 pm: so uh
i quit.

i just want to go sit on a beach somewhere and not have to worry about anything.

11:24 pm: great mysteries
why do i feel so motivated to clean my room


........late at night?

11:59 pm: .....

okay.

08:26 pm: isn't it amazing
the effects of too much studying for finals equals:
-a highly insane group of girls
-dancing in the starbuck parking lot
-fights in the starbucks parking lot
-crazy people in trucks watching all of this....in the starbucks parking lot

......all in all an amazing studying night, haha minus the studying aspect.

07:55 pm: pop goes the bubble...
i wish today was thursday, becuase it felt like thursday.

does anybody besides me really NOT want to take the bio test tomorrow?

07:05 pm: haha, random but the asian-ness of it is amazing
this was an e-mail that my mom sent me, that i thought was funny.

>>I had a craving for a sweet taste of childhood the other day; so I went
>>shopping for a can of grass jelly. I was putting said treat into my cart
>>and looking for my Ranch 99 VIP card when a woman with three kids in tow
>>ran into my cart.
>>
>>At that moment, both of us said, "Aiya." The children giggled, she
>>apologized, and I quickly replied, "M'sai. No apology needed." Although
>>it was a minor exchange, I later realized that Aiya is more than just
>>two characters; it is part of the spirit of being Chinese ... in a
>>moment of surprise I could've said just about anything - my reaction was
>>to say Aiya. I was surprised that I would instinctively use my mother's
>>tongue because I've always known that I don't speak Cantonese well. No
>>matter how far removed I've become as an Am! erican, there is something at
>>my core that is Chinese.
>>
>>I decided to conduct informal research about Aiya. First, I went to a
>>national bookstore chain to review its Chinese language materials. I
>>thumbed through all the Chinese language materials, but couldn't find
>>any vocabulary drill including Aiya. Seeing that the publishers of
>>tourist books were not going to be helpful, I decided to observe its use
>>in the community. I clipped my cell phone to my belt, grabbed a couple
>>of bakery pink boxes and sat around San Francisco's Portsmouth Square
>>drinking 7-Up and eating dim sum. Lo and behold, I heard Aiya used in a
>>variety of ways.
>>
>>Based on my personal experience and this observation, I've developed a
>>personal understanding of Aiya. Aiya is 24-! carat Chinese gold. Aiya is
>>more than just two charac ters; it is part of the spirit of being Chinese
>>and may even go back to antiquity. It is used wherever the Chinese have
>>been in the diaspora of the last sesquicentennial.
>>
>>How you say Aiya can say volumes about your state of mind. For example,
>>when the problem is minor, I can say "Aiya" in a short/curt manner.
>>However when I am extremely stressed, I can draw it out to nearly five
>>seconds. (I'm planning an experiment where I get a room full of people
>>to meditate using it as a mantra.. With practice, I might get them to
>>draw out Aiya even longer.)
>>
>>To explain more deeply how to use Aiya, imagine a worker slaving on the
>>Great Wall when he accidentally drops a brick (a quickie Aiya) on the
>>work foreman (Aiya!!) - which gets him thrown into the wall to perish an&! nbsp;
>>agonizing death (AIYA!!!!)
>>
>>As you read the following ways Aiya can be used, the mental image to
>>solicit is to picture any of the mothers from Amy Tan's *The Joy Luck
>>Club.* For those who have met anyone in my family, you can picture one
>>of my relatives instead:
>>
>>Surprise: "Aiya! A surprise party for me?"
>>
>>Joy: "Aiya! You got 5 out of 6 in Lotto!"
>>
>>Distaste: "You expect me to drink that herbal medicine concoction of
>>yours? Aiya!"
>>
>>Doubt: "Do I have to wear that lemon yellow/lime green sweater my
>>mother made? I wonder if she would notice if I
>>'accidentally' donated it to Goodwill? Aiya."
>>
>>Awe: "Your son got accepted into Harvard Law School!?! Aiya!" >>
>>Irritation: "Clean your room. Aiya! Why you live like a pig?"
>>
>>Large astonishment: "Aiya! She switch majors from Business to Art
>>History!"
>>
>>Disapproval: "Report Card-5 A, 1 B? Always a B in Math. Aiya." (Actual
>>quote from my mother when I was a sophomore in
>>high school.)
>>
>>Shock: "What? Ketchup on Yang Chow Fried Rice ... Aiya!"
>>
>>Lamentation: "Aiya ... why me ... ungrateful child ... Aiya." (Probably
>>what my mother is thinking when she reads this.)
>>
>>Outrage: "Never clean your rice cooker with that steel scouring pad!
>>Aiya!"
>>
>>Verge of internal combustion: "I can't deal with the family asking when
>>and if I'm getting married! Ai-yaaa!"
>>
>>Aiya is an all-purpose phrase that comes from deep ! in the soul. Aiya is
>>both simple and complex: on one hand it is a couple of Chinese
>>characters, on the other hand it can be a whole speech describing the
>>state you are in. Aiya says, "I'm afraid", "I'm in pain", "I don't
>>believe it. " It is an exclamation of exuberance, a shout of hurt, a cry
>>of fear, and the reflex of being startled, and the embrace of joy.
>>
>>It is unfortunate that English has no equivalent to Aiya. It saddens me
>>that American English doesn't afford me a fun phrase to emote. "Shucks",
>>"Darn" and the plethora of swear words cannot convey what Aiya can. So,
>>I'm going to propose that we start an initiative for American English
>>should grab on Aiya or the Yiddish "Oy" for our use.
>>
>>So the next time you go to a teahouse for dim sum or decide to g! o
>>shopping at an Asian market, listen to the lively b anter as friends and
>>families meet. It's a wonderfully vibrant, alive community out there.
>>Who knows, you just might get caught up the lyrical rhythm of the
>>people.
>>
>>Aiya, what fun!


... why do i always post stuff instead of doing hwk?

08:44 pm: so i've decided

i believe that a new bond has risen between arash and myself. arash, i would like to say. i like it. 

three's a crowd. i miss you. we didnt' get our one dinner this weekend, but that's ok

i would also like to say, that i don't fully understand why. but this kind of goes back to the arash thing. but not really. i've started talking to the most random people this year, and its really amazing how cool they are. not that i didn't think they were cool before, i'm just saying that once you get to know somebody you see them in a whole different light.

09:05 am: HELP!
i'm working on my sr. brag sheet, late, i know. but!!!! 

ask two or three friends to describe you. Write all the attributes, adjectives and insights they have to offer. 

does anybody want to answer this for me? please? thank you!

09:37 pm: i miss my escaladies

I HATE THIS!

why can't everything be easy?

10:03 pm:

I GOT INTO COLLEGE!!!

yes, that's right.
someone, somewhere wants me!
AH! i'm have a college! 
sfsu
its my number 1 CA school, and also my safety

this is exactly how my convo w/ my mom went
Mom: wow, this is so exciting
Lauren: yes, it is
Mom: lets go eat some wonton
Lauren:*wtf? starts laughing*
Mom: idk it just sounded good, ok.

 

12:17 am: aww
so basically summer is almost over

I DON"T LIKE IT!

but today was amazing, the beach was so fun

i'll be posting pictures probably soon, but if not later

but everybody else who had camera's PLEASE POST PICTURES!! becuase i want to see what other people had of the fights!!!